Friday, August 5, 2011

                                                                                                                                                                         {copyright Jason Stevens}

I believe happiness is a choice. We may not always be able to change our circumstances but we have total control over how we react to it. Sometimes it's easy to let life's ups and downs dictate how we feel. Similar to how easy it is to let the weather affect our mood. I can't control the weather. But I can control my mood.

I can't always control how my body feels. But I can control how I choose to deal with it. I can choose to feel sorry for myself and wish things were how they used to be or I can focus on how I manage today.

Recently,  I let myself have a grand pity party. There were big sloppy tears, teeth gnashing, more tears. All I wanted was to go back to how things used to be. I wanted my old life back and I knew there is no going back. No matter how this chapter in my life ends, life will never be exactly like it was before. I've grown too much, I've learned too much to see my life through an old lens.

There is no going back. I can only move forward, accept the things I cannot change and create my own internal weather.


scot vorwaller said...

That is a beautiful picture. It illustrates your thoughts so perfectly, it pulled me right in. Sometimes tears help clear out the many frustrations in life, and then, just like in the picture it's time to dance. I hope you find many moments to dance even though it's raining in your life.

- Scot

John Bradfield said...

You rock, Kristi,

And so does your amazing daughter. What a perfect photo! Jason is definitely gifted. I love photography and have a studio in my basement, but I still hope to be as good as Jason one day.

Scot said it well. Tears are good. We blessed our Em yesterday. It was awesome! When my wife bore her testimony she said, "We hear of people going through trials all the time. We hear them say how, when they look back, they can see the Lord's hand, and we think to ourselves, 'of course.' But going through trials teaches us that Father still allows us—even expects us— to feel pain and frustration, even to feel crushed. And that's okay too because it sheds more light on our Savior and what his sacrifice means for us individually."

In that light, we can even more readily dance in the rain.

She wondered if it made any sense at all. I told her that it did to me and I'm sure it did to anyone who has had to struggle.

Good luck and know that you and your family are in a lot of prayers, including mine.

- John

Kim Anderson said...

I sure love you, and your positive outlook. And I adore this photo. It belongs in a frame.